Aslı Tandoğan: O soruya cevap vermemeliydim

<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; font-size: 16px;">Doğan, hakkında merak edilenleri ve ilişkisine dair bilinmeyenleri Marie Claire dergisine anlattı.

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◊ Seni, magazin basınından tanıdık. Gerçek Aslıhan kimdir? Kendini bize biraz anlatır mısın?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Geçtiğimiz aralık ayında 31 yaşına bastım. Üniversite yıllarıma kadar eğitimimi FMV Ayazağa Işık Lisesi'nde tamamladım. Bunun yanı sıra yedi sene Mimar Sinan Üniversitesi Devlet Konservatuvarı'nda piyano ve solfej dersleri aldım. Üniversite serüvenim Amerika'da başlayıp Londra'da son buldu. University of Westminster Criminal Justice mezunuyum. İstanbul'da ailemle yaşıyorum. Şimdilik aile işlerimize destek oluyorum.

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◊ Hayatta önceliklerin neler?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Her şeyden önce ailem gelir; sonra 'ben' derim. Kendime olan saygımın, itibarımın, iç huzurumun ve mutluluğumun zedelenmemesi için çaba gösteririm. Prensipleri olan bir insanım ve bunlardan kolay kolay vazgeçmem. Tabii zaman zaman tökezlediğim oluyor ama çabuk toparlıyorum. İnsanın soyadı, hassas noktası. Yaptığım ve yapacağım her şeyde ilk önce bunu düşünüyorum.

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HUZURSUZLUK VEENDİŞE YAŞADIK

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◊ Hayata karşı kırılgan mısın? Yoksa her şeyi elinin tersiyle itebilecek kararlılığa mı sahipsin?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Hayata karşı demek doğru mu bilmiyorum ama her insan gibi hayal kırıklıklarım oldu. Bir kabuğum var ve bu aslında bir nevi savunma mekanizmam. Onun içine o kadar az insan alıyorum ki hayatıma, böylelikle dışarıdan gelebilecek zararı en aza indirgiyorum. Oraya girip kalbime dokunabilen insanlar bilir ki, aslında çok hassas bir yapım var. Fakat yaşadıklarım bana, duygularımı çabuk tamir etmeyi öğretti. Bir kez babamı kaybetme ihtimaliyle yüz yüze geldim. Sonra herhangi bir üzüntü yaşadığımda hemen o acıyı hatırladım. Bu sayede başka şeyler için kolay kolay gözyaşı dökemediğimi gördüm.

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◊ Özel hayatından bahsetmek gerekirse... Gündemden düşmeyen bir aşk yaşadın. Bu kadar göz önünde olmak seni endişelendirdi mi? Kendi içinde bu ilişkinin muhakemesini yaptın mı?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Magazin basınının gündeminden düşmeyen bir insanla ilişki yaşayınca, otomatik olarak siz de insanların ilgi odağı hâline geliyorsunuz. Bunu bilerek başladığım bir ilişkide, magazinsel anlamda olmasını beklediğim şeyler oldu. Fakat buna alışık olmadığım için zaman zaman doğru yönetememiş olabilirim. Aynı şekilde ailem de bu konuda tecrübeli insanlar değil. Dolayısıyla bazen huzursuzluk ve endişe yaşadık. Fakat her zaman bir çözüm noktasına ulaştık. İlişki muhakemesine gelince; elbette ki kendi içimde bunu yaptım.

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◊ Ailen ve yakın çevrenin ilişkinize yaklaşımı nasıldı?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Senelere dayanan yakın bir arkadaşlığımız vardı. Bu yüzden ailemle de yakın çevremle de çok iyi bir diyaloğu vardı. Bunu da her zaman iyi muhafaza etti. İlişkime destek olanlar da, köstek olanlar da çok umurumda olmadı açıkçası. İkisini yapanın da niyetini çok fazla bilemezsiniz. Bu yüzden, çevreye çok da söz hakkı tanımadım. İnsan bazı şeyleri kendi yaşayıp görmeli.

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◊ İnsanların bu konuda seni yanlış anladığını ya da kendini ifade edemediğini düşünüyor musun?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Hayır, düşünmüyorum. Yakınlarımla iletişimim oldukça güçlü. Çünkü beni iyi tanırlar. Onun dışındakilere, kendimi ifade etmeye gerek duymadım.

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

"ONUN EV ORTAMI BANA UYMADI" DEMEMELİYDİM

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◊ İlişki neden bitti?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Sanırım burada, magazin basınında yer alan "Ev ortamı bana uymadı" başlığını biraz daha açmam gerekecek. Fakat ayrıntıya girmek yersiz olur. Belki o gün onu bile dememeliydim, çünkü çok farklı yerlere çekildi. İşin özü, son zamanlarda ilişkiyi ihmal etmeye başlamıştık. Önceliklerimiz ve değerlerimiz değişmişti. Bazı şeyleri yitirdik. İleriye taşıyamayacağımızı gördüğümüz noktada da birlikteliğimize son verdik. Bu kadar.

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

◊ Her ilişki insanın hayatından bir şeyler alır ya da kazandırır. Bu ilişkinin senin üzerindeki etkisi ne oldu?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Her ilişkinin artıları ve eksileri olur. İkisi eşit sayıda olursa birbirini götürür.

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SOSYAL MEDYADA DiKKATLi OLMAK DURUMUNDAYIM

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

◊ Sosyal medyayı istediğin gibi kullanabildiğini düşünüyor musun? Yoksa bir şey paylaşmadan önce üzerinde kafa yorduğun oluyor mu?

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<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">

<div style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: georgia, "times new roman"; font-size: 12px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px;">- Sosyal medyaya çok zaman ayırmıyorum. Fakat paylaşımlarıma dikkat etmek durumundayım, çünkü bazen anlamsız şeylere yol açabiliyor.